This weekend I decided to create a photo calendar
for 2012 of our UK travels. Sifting through the many photos it occurred
to me that I like almost every single photo of me.
This really took me aback because I am notorious
for hating pictures of myself. I will delete images from the camera with
a harsh critical eye. I am also not above ripping up photos that I
cannot abide by. So to see a plethora of images
of myself in which I cannot find a photo I dislike was shocking, not to
say enlightening.
I remember being told a long time ago (by a book or a
person I cannot say) that we don’t like our reflection in the mirror
because we are not in motion, which is an unnatural state. We are
constantly in motion. I would venture to say that
this is also why we hate our own pictures. Pictures are rarely captured
of us in motion, we are stopped, striking a pose. Some people are
naturals at this. They even have their signature pose. Others not so
much.
I am awkward in front of the camera. As soon as a
camera is pointed my way I freeze up and immediately become
self-conscious. I, admittedly, do NOT know how to strike a pose. The
only pictures I have ever loved of myself are those that
were captured unbeknownst to me. Only then am I truly natural and in
motion.
During our stay in the UK, I was brimming with
unbridled joy. I was animated, giddy, and excited. All of that joy and
happiness is evident in every single photo (save for the one Rhinoa took
where I was ready to pass out from jet lag).
My self-consciousness was replaced with glee. I was relaxed. AND I even
struck a few poses. The last time I felt this way? My wedding day. (And
I also liked 99% of the photos captured that day too. Coincidence? I
think not.)
Photo: my personal collection
